Social media was made to connect us. So why is it tearing relationships apart?
According to research, the more you use social media within a romantic relationship, the more likely happiness decreases. One study found that a 20% increase in Facebook usage was linked to a 4% increase in the divorce rate. Specifics weren’t included, but let’s be real: even if some of those couples had conjoined Facebook profiles, it wouldn’t have changed a damn thing.
Why? Because surveillance isn’t security.
A Personal Flashback: Trust, Cheating, and No Wi-Fi Needed
I grew up believing my grandparents had the perfect marriage. My grandmother was the breadwinner, and my grandfather never seemed to mind — or so I thought.
They were married for 22 years before my mother caught him cheating. And this was just the first time she caught him. Early 90s. No Facebook. No smartphones. Just good ol’ fashioned infidelity and opportunity.
Here’s the thing: people don’t need social media to cheat. They just need a time and a place. That’s always been the case.
Some people try to justify infidelity by saying a man may feel emasculated if his wife is the breadwinner. Maybe that’s how my grandfather felt. Because the women he stepped out with? Absolute garbage. Women who didn’t have standards, who specifically targeted married men for money. It wasn’t about love or lust. It was about ego, attention, and transactional trash.
What Social Media Really Does to Couples
Social media was supposed to connect us. But now, it’s just a digital stage where we:
- Perform perfection
- Air out dirty laundry
- Drop subliminals when we’re mad
And don’t forget the folks who circle like vultures, waiting for you to post something that hints at a relationship crack so they can slide right in.
People think having a shared account will prevent cheating. Spoiler alert: if someone wants to do dirt, they’ll find a way. If not through likes or DMs, then through notes passed like it’s 1965. Cheaters are creative.
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Conjoined Profiles = Code for “We Got Trust Issues”
Let’s be honest: when you see a couple with a shared social media profile, doesn’t it scream somebody messed up?
It usually means one of two things:
- One partner has been untrustworthy and is now being digitally babysat
- Both are insecure and trying to overcompensate
Either way, it doesn’t fix the problem. It usually just encourages sneakier behavior and deeper resentment.
So, Should Couples Avoid Social Media Altogether?
Not necessarily. If you love social media and use it responsibly, it can be a great tool for connection. But if you or your partner feel anxious every time someone new likes a photo or leaves a comment, then maybe the issue isn’t the app — it’s the insecurity.
Shared profiles don’t rebuild trust. They just highlight how broken it already is.
How do you feel about couples’ social media profiles? Are they helping or harming the relationship?
-Teri Nickels (Originally discussed on Medium.com by Teri Nickels)
Have you ever been in a relationship with shared social media? Did it help or hurt? Let’s talk about what really builds trust — and what just looks good online.
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